The Eight Pillars

The Arousal Plan is built on Eight Pillars. Achieving more Arousal in each of these “life areas”…and making sure that Arousal is balanced equally among these areas…is how you’re going to bring more Arousal into your life in general. And by bringing more Arousal into your life in general, you will begin to realize your goals, be they  less weight, more money, less stress, more happiness, less “same old, same old,” more sex, less mess, more love, etc.

The Eight Pillars are:

foodWeek 1: Food – There are a million diets out there that tell you what and how much to eat, but none of them approach food from the simple, and necessary, angle of Arousal. What do you find arousing about food? What foods arouse you? What foods don’t arouse you? What foods do you eat a lot of even though they don’t arouse you? What foods don’t you eat a lot of that you find arousing? How can Arousal help you gain control over AND pleasure from eating? By getting you in touch with the way your Arousal, eating habits and appetite interact, I’ll give you the power to achieve whatever kind of dietary changes you desire.

exerciseWeek 2: Exercise – Part of my job is to tell you what you know but don’t want to hear, and that is perhaps nowhere more important than in the area of exercise. If you are not exercising regularly, you are dying regularly. It’s that simple. Now, sure, you might hate the idea of exercising, but that’s only because you haven’t figured out how to link exercise and Arousal! That’s what we’ll do this week. We’ll work together to figure out what kind of exercise you will actually REALLY WANT to do, because that’s the only exercise you will ever actually do!

clothing2Week 3: Clothing – One of the best ways to change your outlook is to change your outfit. You can’t feel good unless you feel like you look good. That’s why this week we concentrate on getting more Arousal into your wardrobe. This is also where we start to discuss how BEING AROUSED is the mirror image of BEING AROUSING. If you’re arousing to others, others will arouse you. And being arousing to others involves dressing in a way that makes you feel arousing. Small changes in how you dress…or how you think about what you wear…can bring BIG changes in your Arousal levels. That’s what we’ll do this week.

homeWeek 4: Living Space – Your physical space determines your mental space. And your mental space determines your Arousal. That’s why this week we will work on making your physical space more arousing. We’ll convert it from a space where you get dragged down to a space where you get turned on. We’ll convert it from a space that pushes people away to a space that draws them in. We’ll work to carve out a space for you where you can get done what you need to get done so you can have more of what you want to get on. Total space Arousal. That’s this week.

loveWeek 5: Sex and Love – Sure, Arousal is intimately tied up with sex, but getting more Arousal out of your sex life can be challenging. We all fall into ruts, few of us have everything we desire, and many of us (to misquote an old song) are looking for Arousal in lots of wrong places. Books that take the approach of getting you to “spice up your sex life” through new positions, toys, and partners are missing one key ingredient – a person needs to be in touch with what arouses them before they can achieve more Arousal. But once they’re in touch with that, the sky’s the limit. And that’s where we’ll go this week.

workWeek 6: Work and Money – Everyone has a different situation with their work world, but one thing can be stated universally: being aroused by your job is A LOT better than NOT being aroused. Now, I can’t make you be totally aroused by your job if it truly sucks, as some jobs do, but there are a lot of things we can do together to bring more Arousal into your work life, either by changing how you operate in your current work life or by gaining a new work life. Such will be our task for this week.

Week 7: Culture – I know, I know. For many of you, the last thing you culturewant to hear are snobby tips on what kind of “kultcha” you should be imbibing. But that’s not what we’ll do this week. Rather, this pillar is about rethinking what you watch, listen to, browse and read so that it can be more arousing to you and bring more arousal into your life. Instead of giving specific recommendations, I’ll provide you with questions, anecdotes, and worksheets that will help you figure out how to change your cultural intake so that you get the maximum amount of Arousal out of it, much of which will involve the exciting possibilities inherent in engaging others in (and meeting others through) whatever kind of “kultcha” turns you on!

passionWeek 8: Power Project – After years of conducting therapy sessions, I’ve found one thing to be extremely true: if you don’t have a Power Project, you won’t “project” power. What’s a Power Project? A Power Project is simply something you care passionately about, that you engage in “for the love of it,” that makes you feel powerful, and that gets you actively involved in improving the world (if only by improving yourself). You might think of a Power Project as “walking the walk, not just talking the talk.” It gets you going. It gets you into something. It turns you on. And by turning you on, it brings major Arousal into your life. In this last Pillar Week, I’ll help you find your Power Project.